Sunday, February 14, 2010
GOD SAYS "NO!": My Life rejoices in his decision
Back in my early college years, I fell deeply in love with Bill. In order to understand this young man, one must picture his fresh face, brown eyes that sparkled when he laughed, slight-built body, and an inquisitive mind. We were introduced by our mutual love, the written word. He fancied himself as the next big-town reporter and I loved the work we did on the college newspaper.
Our time together had its own soundtrack, as the music we enjoyed still resonates with me. Many musicians passed through our town and concerts were affordable. Neil Diamond was one of the romantic performers; my daughter still teases me about seeing him. Outdoor venues, smoky auditoriums and college campuses provided plenty of opportunities to experience the "surround sound" of live performances.
Nitty Gritty Dirt Band's concert was recorded and I still have the LP of that special time, where we sat upstairs with our legs dangling through the railing. My embroidered bell bottom jeans, love beads, gauzy shirt and brown leather clogs made me look so individual that I succeeded in looking like every other long, brown haired girl there.
My concert experience are remembered fondly and I know that I have related them one too many times to my daughter when she turns to me, upon hearing the beginning a familiar song, "Yeah, Mom, I know. You and Bill were sitting in the balcony when The Fifth Dimension sang Won't you marry me, Bill? "
What I don't repeatedly tell her is how completely devastated I was when Bill broke up with me. Prayers to God were answered with a loud, definite "No." I beg, pleaded and bargained with God to make it right and give me back the lost relationship. Again, a resounding, definite, "NO."
Now, I am so grateful, because without losing Bill I wouldn't have gained the most incredible life I have. My husband would have been lost to me, my daughter wouldn't exist and to think of not having my Grand Love breaks my heart.
So, thank you, God for being patient with me and giving me the most fantastic gift of all, my precious family.