Sunday, June 6, 2010

FLUID PLANS: GOING WITH THE FLOW




Over twenty-six years ago, this sign represented hope for our young family. My husband had decided that his addictions to drugs and alcohol had taken too much away from us, so he came to this place to find sobriety and sanity. Through many days of struggle, soul searching and commitment, the bumpy road to recovery was traveled by my husband. Relationships affected by addiction are fragile and must be reinforced by therapy for both of us. Throughout the years following addiction treatment, Alcoholics Anonymous meetings provided guidelines for healthy living.

During this weekend, we drove the same wavy, twisty journey to Starlite, so that we could attend an alumni weekend. We were surrounded by hundreds of sober-living people who had a great time eating, visiting, playing games, admiring each other's families and listening to speeches from invited guests.

Orginally, Hubby was to speak at one and then the time was changed to two and finally three o'clock was the assigned time. Doesn't sound like a big deal, does it? Each time the schedule changed, my hubby greeted the new time with, "Okay, that works for me, no problem." He didn't let the changes bother him, which helped him adjust his attitude quite quickly. Others might let postponments irritate, but not someone who appreciated all that a sober life had given him. You have to admire someone who knows that another life could have been his, if he hadn't choosen sobriety. Acceptance of changes kept my husband cool, while others around him fretted and itched with impatience.

While waiting for the speakers, music was played and Papa held his Grandlove so that they could dance. They danced like no one was watching. They danced under the hot, summer sky. They danced in joy and appreciation for all that is right in the world. They celebrated sobriety and sweetness. Capturing this moment and holding it in our hearts is what matters to us the most.

All the activities were conducted outside and for those not in our area, it is SUMMER here, already. Large, well placed, ice tubs held bottled water and sno-cones did their best to cool our insides; while the sheltering oak trees cast cool, lacy shadows. Each soft, brave breeze was greeted with a sigh of relief from us.

Our Grandlove was precious as usual. He entertained himself by exploring the blades of grass that tickled his bare legs; attempting to eat elusive ice chips from his great-grandmother's hand; and flirting with all the pretty ladies in the audience. He actually was more patient than others in our family who seemed to think that continually announcing, "I'm Hot!" would make the day cooler. Finally, late in the afternoon, I strapped the little guy in his stroller, found the shadiest spot and rocked him to sleep. What a precious little guy.

Driving home (boy was that a long drive) gave us time to appreciate how far we have come. During my husband's treatment, I would drive up on Friday nights and on Sundays I would drive home with our little girl passed out in the backseat. Now, we had our curly-headed Grandlove in the backseat and his mom next to him, love just keeps growing with us.

We are a sober family, who appreciates the past in order to value the present.

6 comments:

  1. Very nice legacy for your grandson.

    Continued successes all around.

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  2. Starlite, starbrite....first star I see tonight.

    I wish I may, I wish I might...be joyous in my friends' success and sobriety, and gratefulness for each beautiful day, as they surely appreciate each little detail and every small triumph.

    What a wonderful post. I congratulate you and your family, and hope for you continued blessings. Life is truly a circle, and your journey is not yet completed. May each day be even brighter for you.

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  3. Thank you both for the positive remarks. You guys are kind in your appreciation for the growth in our family.

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  4. It's a tough road, I know but it seems as if you and your family have come a long way. I am so happy for you. Keep up the good work and have faith.

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  5. What a long way you've travelled. I'm thankful that your husband chose to do the hard - lifesaving - work and come back to himself and your family. His reward is clearly showing in this post.

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  6. Congratulations to you both, you survived intact! I understand how difficult it is, as my husband has been clean & sober for 3 years now. He went off for 3 months to a treatment facility & I was only able to visit him once, it was a long 3 months to be sure! We have been "good" for 2 years now, the first year I was unsure we would make it, today I can say that I am pretty sure we will. I credit the birth of our granddaughter to his, mine & our success, she gave us something bigger than us to focus on. It was difficult waiting at the hospital for her arrival alone though, I was bitter for a while about that.

    I believe you & I have had many disagreements about addiction, its causes & cures, but believe me, we do agree on how hard it is on everyone involved & how wonderful life can be once it has been addressed. I wish y'all the very best & many many years of happiness!

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