Pain in many forms

Today, I needed a very painful procedure.  I knew that it would be so painful; in fact I was worried that would scream, yelp or make lots of noise. So, this is what I did. I put rubing alcohol on a cotton ball, inhaled deeply; put my earbuds in and pushed play on "Barcelona" with Freddie Mercury and his operatic equal.  Kept my senses bust, the procedure didn't hurt, in fact, I didn't feel anything. My foot was treated and I will have future treatments, with no fear of pain. You see if I know something will hurt, I can prepare myself to endure anything.  Everything was great....

Until, I pulled into my driveway and sat there crying. My foot was hurting, it was my memories of situations that hurt me more than anyone could imagine. I sat for days with my dying mother, telling her I would be fine.  And then years later I sat, cradling my first born grandchild as he took his last breath; handing his body to his father to carry ro the gurney from the funeral home vehicle; standing holding my daughter's hand and looking as little Stephen's perfect face at the funeral home; and finally standing at the podium to express my love at his service.

So, when I know something is going to hurt, my way of coping is to keep breathing and and know that I will get through whatever pain is thrown at me. Just let me prepare and then after it's over, give me space to cry and then breath again.